Who am I subscribed to?
Only about 50% of my email list opens my emails...Which is totally cool, but I can't help but wonder - why are the rest of you here?
It's kind of a joke to ask this question, since they don't open the email and read what's inside, amIright?
But you're here, and you make writing these emails worthwhile. Your responses make my day. I love being encouraged by you and encouraging you in turn.
I read every email I receive. You are the best!
I know you know, because I totally told you, but I'm doing this #unblemished challenge for the month of September, and I realized something very interesting.
The last two days were thus: Day 14 - Three positive words to describe you; Day 15 - three negative things others have said about you.
Just as with every other day, I posted my words for both days in the form of a creative instagram picture (Thank you, Canva), and went about with my life.
Thing is, I hardly got ANY response on the positive words. No affirmation, no "hear hear!" or anything like that, really. Maybe one comment on Facebook?
But on the negative day, I received a SLEW of responses from people telling me the negative words weren't true. That they were lies, and the commentors were sorry anyone had ever said such things to me.
It was weird, because I was just following the challenge. I was only doing what I'd agreed to do in starting #Unblemished U. Those words, in that moment, didn't hurt. They were just words people had used against me.
People I'd already "unsubscribed" from.
While it was super great to have support and positivity pour in from my friends and family, reminding me that these words weren't true, I wondered why they weren't agreeing with me the day before? Affirming the words that I hoped described me? Is it perceived vanity? Or the illusion of confidence, and therefore I didn't need any help believing it?
I think it's a lot easier for us to be negative about ourselves than positive (obvs), but I wonder if that's because people accept the negativity. They accept the idea that they can combat that. When we're positive, people go silent. Is silence agreement?
How many of us walk around with negative things others have said about us weighing us down each and every day, either because we feel we can't be positive about ourselves (as we're met with blank faces), or because we don't believe anything positive about ourselves?
Who in your life is saying negative things about you? Making you feel bad? Who is just rolling their eyes when you find an ounce of confidence and hold tight, lifting your chin and saying "I can do this. You have no power over me"?
I think it's time to unsubscribe from them. Online, in life...whatever capacity they are to you. You deserve people who are going to run to your aid the way I had when I posted the negative words people had said.
You also need people who are going to say "damn straight" when you tell a positive truth about yourself or have self-confidence.
Anyone else isn't necessary, and news flash - it's okay to cut them out of your life. It might feel like it isn't, like you're being mean, but you don't have to be friends (or even family) with someone who treats you poorly.
Put up some boundaries.
And hold tight to your positive words, letting the negative ones brush off.
What are 3 positive words about you and 3 negative things that people have said about you?
Which one was easier to come up with? I'm open for discussion. Reply to this email and let's have a little chat.
As always, keep on embracing your #swanitude, you adorable swans, you.
Kelsey Unsubscribing Swan